Suffering and Death

I think I just ran a red light. I was driving along in the stupor of a death-inducing chest cold and when I looked in my rearview mirror I noticed a red light behind me. Maybe it was green my direction but I honestly don’t remember looking at it.

Then I pulled into the pharmacy drive-through and sat there for a few minutes staring at the window before I finally realized I had to press the call button to alert them that I was waiting. I was picking up cough syrup. Stinkin’ lousy cough syrup. That’s all they would give me at the clinic. I was hoping for morphine or a throat and lung amputation. But cough syrup!

I get so peeved when I go to the doctor and they say that I just have the same old virus that everyone else has, no big deal. If everyone else has what I have, then the pandemic must be here because I don’t care what they say, I can’t have more than 10 or 15 minutes to live.

I feel like I’ve caught everything this winter, 2 chest colds, sinus infections, stomach flu, a menacing hangnail and split ends. My dentist even suggested recently that I need to go to “tongue rehab.”

As I sat in the pharmacy parking lot waiting for my stinkin’ cough syrup to have the sticker stuck on it, I watched a pair of mummified senior old people inching their way to their parked car. They were walking directly towards a yellow Camaro and I was hoping against hope that it was theirs. Sadly they climbed into the burgundy Oldsmobile beside it. It would have cheered me greatly if theirs was the sports car and I really needed some cheering right about then.

At this point in my sickness I’m half-waiting for some bearded figure to pop up on Al Jazeera and claim responsibility for a biological warfare attack on the Seattle suburbs. Whatever they used, it’s working. I surrender.

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12 Responses to Suffering and Death

  1. alex says:

    UGh, I hate being sick, but at least your pandemic has the same side effects on your drama gene as the one I had! I’m not a diva when I’m sick, I SWEAR, the germs are!

  2. Courtney says:

    I love the part about sitting at the window staring at it – I did that once at a drive up bank…

  3. allysha says:

    that is awful. what a bummer. I hope you keep all your lungs in tact and feel better very, very soon!

  4. Karen says:

    Aw bummer. I’m so sorry that you’re sick AGAIN. Maybe you should germ-bomb your house. And then put yourself in a big bubble. Google those two things, there isn’t anything you can’t find on the internet.

    Get well soon. 🙁

  5. Pam in Utah says:

    Oh man, I’m sorry about that. I hope you get better soon. Three words. Cod Liver Oil. 🙂

  6. Shalee says:

    Oh, you poor dear. It sucks being the mom and sick at the same time. I sure do hope you feel better soon.

    I have to admit: I got off scotch-free this winter. I don’t even recall having a cold… But then again, it’s allergy season here so I’m sure to start in on something soon. Well that and I’m pretty scattered brain – I could have been on death’s door and just have forgotten about it.

  7. The Wiz says:

    “I think I just ran a red light.”

    Well, that tends to happen when you drive and blog at the same time.

  8. Poor girl. You write an awesome post, though, for someone who is near death.

  9. You’ve been sick a lot this winter, but now it’s spring and you can get that much needed sunshine and all the wonderful things that come with it.
    All the healthy stuff you’ve been trying to eat might not be working for you. Maybe the body is in shock.
    You could be a magnet for the nasty cold bugs or maybe the cold bugs had a wonderful time this winter living with you they decided to stay…

  10. Lei says:

    Also guilty of blindly passing through intersections, and red lights have also caught my eye in my rear view mirror! Scary, huh?

    Feel better soon!

  11. kittyhox says:

    My husband has what sounds like the same thing. And when he finally went to the doctor she was pretty much no help at all and sent him to the pharmacy for cough syrup. Just listening to him wheez and struggle to breath and cough and hack… just makes me so mad at someone. I don’t know at whom I should be mad. The doctor, for not fixing it? Whichever person left their icky sick germs on his grocery shopping cart? Maybe it IS the Taliban. I think I’ll direct my righteous anger this way.

    Anyhoo, he is getting better and I hope you will, too – immediately! It isn’t right for mama’s to get sick…

  12. Faith says:

    Kudos to you for attempting to keep your sense of humor while sick! Hope your family gets rid of it quickly.

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