Portrait of a Cyborg

Things are strange around here.

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In ocular health news… it still kills! I’m giving the antibiotics a couple of days before going back to my neighbor’s house for things which I don’t know what they are. (If you comment on my funky eyebrows, I will FIND you.)

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This morning I came down and found Belle and Sinead hanging out in the hallway. I’m so glad to have creative outlets like this. I’m also glad that besides having no god, Polly’s world also contains no metal parts.

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I paid less than $3 for gas for the first time in forever… and was so excited about it that I took a picture.

Shaq has a new reality show where his image consultant has him helping obese kids lose weight. It’s getting good reviews and the premise seems promising. Here are a few quotes from the first episode that make me think it will be the best, most sensitive insightful reality show about children EV-ER:

“Of course they’re gonna tell me the truth. I’m a superstar.”

“I don’t know if I’ve ever seen anything this pathetic in my entire life. It disgusts me.”

“We’re gonna have to turn up the heat on these kids.” Then he smashes a bottle… because he CARES.

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19 Responses to Portrait of a Cyborg

  1. Liz says:

    Your eyebrows are not funky at all. They are fabulous. And WOOT I got first comment

  2. Jeana says:

    Oh my word. The combination of the name “Sinead” and the creative outlets killed me.

  3. marcia says:

    Love the “Sty”borg and creative outlets I like your punishing humor one of my online names is gottaluvpuns

  4. heather says:

    eyebrows? All I noticed was your pretty green eyes. Hee hee- the girls in the outlet is too funny. I’m assuming that was Laylee’s handiwork!

    Ohh, I got gas for $2.88 at costco last week-Whoot!!

    Did you hear that Paula Abdul has her own show now on Bravo? Makes me grateful that we don’t have cable.

  5. Shalee says:

    First off, your eye isn’t as bad as I imagined. I guess I was picturing bloodshot, boxer-punched eyes. So that’s a good point.

    The Sinead description had me spitting coffee on my screen. My screen thanks you for the dusting it has to receive.

    And the gas is going to KILL ME this summer. (The kind for your car I mean… I don’t have any problems with exploding from the inside out. Just so you know.) The trips we’re going to take to see the kids may outcost what it would have been to find childcare and just keep them home! But I’m sure I won’t think of that once I’ve got them wrapped in bear hugs…

  6. Jennifer says:

    “new realty show”

    I thought he was giving away houses! (Sorry to pick on your spelling.)

  7. Kimberly says:

    Okay, I’ve had the exact same look in my eye before (~snickers a bit~). Essentially a sty (technical name: external/internal hordeolum) burst, and realeased the infection into your eyelid. It hurts like all heck. Antibiotics are a good idea, stick with the full regimen the doc prescribed, because it can turn serious if not dealt with. The best way to treat it is hot compresses. As hot as you can stand. Heating it up helps you fight the infection. Unfortunately, it also makes it redder and more swollen. Apply a cold compress when you want to be seen in public or anything like that. Do the compresses regularly throughout the day and you’ll speed up the healing process ten fold. Trust me, I get these all the time! Just to make Neil’s Optometry school experience more interesting, you know. I’ll tell you a funny story about that someday. Or maybe I’ll do my first Flashback Friday post tomorrow. =)

    Good luck! I know it kills!

  8. KYouell says:

    I also don’t mean to pick, but I read it both ways simultaneously and thought Shaq was selling houses on the side and that they were doing a reality show about his realty business. Now *that* might be funny enough to watch, but this picking on overweight kids doesn’t sound good at all.

  9. Sarah says:

    Despite your right eye being grotesquely deformed, you still hav beautiful eyelashes. Of which I ave none and am greatly jealous.

  10. Jessica G. says:

    Having the phrases “Shaq” and “reality show” in the same sentence makes my gut clench. Seriously, haven’t we as tv-viewers suffered enough?

    And love the, uh, outlet decorations…I ‘spect I’ll be seeing those often once da Boo gets into dolls (currently Littlest Pet Shop-obsessed).

  11. Stephanie says:

    Your gas is cheaper than here?

    Well, at least the other eye looks GOOD.

  12. sarah k. says:

    I am gonna SUE! I swear all three of those quotes came right outa my mouth and he STOLE them from me. Since he’s a superstar, I should make bank just on the settlement. And I will settle, because I’m not vindictive, not I’m not. I just want what’s mine, and I said it first. I was gonna trademark the smashing of the bottle, but when it made contact, it just bounced out of my hand, ricocheted off the cupboard, and hit me square in the eye. You can guess how attractive that is. You ain’t got nothin’ on my black eye.

  13. Carrie says:

    I get styes sometimes, too- I’ve always just put a warm wet washcloth on them, and they go away in a couple days…also sometimes it’s because I need to get new mascara- but probably the doctor already told you all that! Good luck with the eye! 🙂

  14. I totally LOVED the new Shaq show! I’m a fan and will keep watching, because I don’t think he has a CLUE. LOL But he WILL. Really, could you imagine not trying the very first week and LYING to Shaq!!!! He could SQUASH all of the at the SAME time! Haha!

  15. I just wanted you to know that occasionally I get cyborg-eye, too. I’ve never taken antibiotics for it, and they always go away on their own. I just put a warm wash cloth on my eye before it gets to big.

  16. Ouch. Stys (or is that sties?) really suck! I actually woke up yesterday with a slight one, but luckily it went away quickly. Must be an epidemic, or something.

    Those dolls in the sockets are pretty scary. Thank God they weren’t wearing boots with metal buckles, or something. 🙂

  17. Susanne says:

    The picture of Belle and Sinead cracked me up this morning. Thanks for a good laugh!!

  18. Angela says:

    Sinead?!? HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

    I totally got sucked into that Shaq show. He is SO amusing to watch. And the smashing of the bottle or whatever at the end, made me laugh big time. My favorite line of the night was “The boys are going to be crazy about you.” Long weird pause and then, “Uh, DUH!” Oh yeah, and I forgot, “I didn’t even know the treadmill could GO that slow.” Yeah, that’s a line I’ve heard before…

  19. andrea says:

    I LOVE the photos of the dolls. My mind is working overtime on what to do after I ste… er … borrow those images for something “conceptually arty.” 🙂

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