Thank you all for your comfort, ideas and cyber hugs yesterday. It’s amazing what good a little time, sleep, perspective and chocolate chip cookie dough will do. I got a recommendation from my doctor for another naturopath she trusts and I’ll just cross my fingers, prepare to delve into the details of my personal and medical history and try again.

I’m worried about Laylee’s hearing, even more so because in the past couple of months she’s become obsessed with sign language. I thought it was really cute until yesterday when the initial hearing tests showed a problem. My mind is prone to spiral out of control with “what ifs”.

What if she loves sign language so much because she’s in the beginning stages of a profound degenerative hearing loss?

I loved sign language as a teenager and always had a feeling it was because I’d someday have a deaf child? What if Laylee’s becoming that child?

What if I never lose the baby weight from Magoo?

What if American Idol ends up in a tie between the two Davids?

I could go on like this forever. I am truly much more calm today and much more in touch with reality. It just seems like the more things that go wrong, the more things seem wrong and you start to notice problems where they don’t exist.

But truly this bad weather does exist. It has existed for far too long, even for Seattle. I’m starting to think that this global warming stuff is all a lie and that living more green is plunging my family into the depths of eternal drizzleish winter.

I’m seriously tempted to turn on every light and appliance in the house, go through the McDonald’s drivethrough in a Hummer, kill a few slugs and spiders with acid, slather my arms with paraben-full lotion, hire a few slave children to help me flush a couple hundred rolls of bleached toilet paper made from ancient Amazon rainforests down my high flow toilet, feed chili beans to some cows and dump a chemistry set over the fields of my nearest organic hemp farm.

If green stops the warming, then I’m gonna live black or red or whatever’s the opposite of green for a while. OH SUN, WHERE ART THOU!!???

**Megan, Jenny, All Adither, Isabel, and Renae have all promised me sun tomorrow. If it rains, I’m burning their blogs to the ground and dancing amidst the flames.**

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31 Responses to SUN!!!

  1. Jd says:

    My desire to learn sign language in fourth grade lead me down a different path. I thought if I just stopped talking my parents would have to teach me more signs so I could talk to them. Those were a very quiet 3 hours.

    Sorry to hear about Laylee.


  2. My wife is teaching Baby Dumpling sign language. She’s not deaf we just feel that it’s a good way for babies to communicate better with parents who don’t speak baby. I’ve seen it work with 1 year old and she seemed to be calmer and didn’t get frustrated so easily. Having the 3 year old trying to teach me was a bit embarassing.
    No matter what, you’ll always be able to find things that aren’t perfect especially Seattle weather. Get a few of the Sun lamps/Sun bulbs and stragically place them around the house. I picked up the lamp for about $20 at the local big chain home improvement center, and the bulbs are about $5. It’s just full light spectrum stuff. It’s known that people actually do suffer from Sunlight withdrawl.
    Do your best to keep things in prospective, and the emotions in check.

  3. Mary says:

    I’ve got to be quick, so I can’t comment on the whole post, but just to say that I love how despite some rough times, you are so totally funny!

  4. Beth says:

    I think it’s very hard, as mothers, to find out something like that. We want our children not to suffer or have medical hardships. What you are feeling is normal.

    I have no advice…..just more cyber hugs. And yes…get your booty down here for a ride in my bus! 🙂

  5. Jaclyn says:

    Aww i’m sorry to hear about Laylee…and i totally agree with you about the sun. Where I live, it just got out of the negative numbers a week ago, so I’ve been feeling the same way about going green. (btw, red is the opposite of green on the colour spectrum.)

  6. All Adither says:

    I don’t know if it’ll make you feel any better, but I had a TON of ear infections as a child. When I was a little older, I remember a hearing test during which the techs shook their heads, saying that I had some hearing loss.

    I’m now all grown up and really, don’t notice the hearing loss thing at all. I don’t know if it was temporary? Or if it was just such a small amount of loss that it doesn’t affect my life much?

    Anyway, maybe that’s a small comfort.

  7. Awesome Mom says:

    Come on over yo my house and melt with me. We have so much darn sun that it is going to be 100 degrees today. The fun thing is that I am in Northern California not the southwest, so there is no AC to be had. If Evan did not have physical therapy today I would be hiding out at the beach and enjoying the water.

  8. Feeding chili beans to some cows? That’s one I’d definitely never thought of. But thoughts of losing my own two kids’ worth of baby weight could make me just about that desperate.

  9. Renaedujour says:

    Where in the heck is the sun? So sorry. Maybe it will come out this afternoon.

  10. Isabel says:

    Did you hear that McDonald’s has free sandwiches today? THEY DO.

    And um…you’re right…I did say it was supposed to be sunny on Friday. And it if it isn’t…I’ll probably burn my own blog down!

  11. mother of the wild boys says:

    I second the sun lamp thing…I have one and it really does help!

  12. Mar says:

    I’m masters level trained auditory oral teacher of the deaf, and would be more than happy to answer any questions you may have about hearing testing, hearing loss, and amplification options. Hang in there; I know it’s hard, but there’s lots of good research and technology out there!


  13. Shalee says:

    I started signing because I wanted to befriend some people who couldn’t hear and looked lonely. Now I imagine that God wanted me to learn signing so that I’ll be prepared for the future – my future. I hope it’s not the case, but I’ll be ready if it is.

    Girl, I still have baby fat from when The Boy was born. He’s 8 1/2. I’m not going to worry about it much more.

    I won’t promise rain, but I’ll promise you that you won’t always feel this way. God’s word is gold and he said that he won’t give you more than you can handle (even when it seems like he was wrong.)

    I’m saying a prayer for you, sweet Kathryn. God will point you to the right doctor for both you and Laylee. (And would it really be so bad if both the Davids won? I think not. They’re both so different from each other that it would be a bonus for us, the audience!)

  14. bon says:

    You KNOW where an organic hemp farm is? Heck…. don’t mess with the chemistry set, just call the cops!

  15. Melanie says:

    We are like this [doing the two finger, peace sign, eyeball thingy] about having another baby. I really want to have another, but need to get rid of at least 10 pounds. And deal with the fibroids.

    Hubby gave me six months to figure everything out before the baby discussion is off the table. I’m already one month down.

    We have plenty of sun today in So Cal, I’ll try to send some your way!

  16. So glad it’s a little sunnier where you are today (if only metaphorically). And the “opposite-of-green” things to do paragraph — hilarious!! Pure comic genius. I may be smiling all day!

  17. Carrie says:

    I know – it’s been a rough spring hasn’t it?

    I am still waiting for the sun – it’s almost noon and I don’t have any. But it’ll come – for both of us.

    Here comes the sun, little darling. Here comes the sun.

  18. It’s called catastrophizing and I do the same thing. Have done much of it recently. I feel your gloomy weather (and baby) pain. My neighbor’s little boy has some hearing loss, he’s 4, and he’s darling. It presents challenges but she says she’s learned and grown a lot from the process. Special pre-schools, sign language, and all! Good luck. Oh yeah, the sun is out today where I live, too!

  19. It’s called catastrophizing and I do the same thing. Have done much of it recently. I feel your gloomy weather (and baby) pain. My neighbor’s little boy has some hearing loss, he’s 4, and he’s darling. It presents challenges but she says she’s learned and grown a lot from the process. Special pre-schools, sign language, and all! Good luck.

  20. Renaedujour says:

    I see sun. Do you see sun?

  21. Rachel H says:

    You are too funny! We had a record snowstorm in our city this year in March- seriously a record in 100 years- and I totally thought the same thing!! What about this freaking global warming – I am just freezing!! I’d prefer a little warming thankyou! And BTW, I always turn on like every light in the house when its rainy and dark because it does help!!

    And I don’t know if I have hearing damage but whenever my sister comes over she’s always turning down the radio and tv or whatever is on, like “Oh that is SO LOUD!” and I’m always like- “Oh, I thought it was perfectly fine!” So I think lots of people wander around with hearing damage and probably never even know it!

  22. Melissa says:

    Hang in there w/ the potential hearing issues. I SO understand…..been there, done that w/ four of ours (although after the first, the other three being diagnosed were really not as overwhelming). I’m sure Laylee will be fine, but in case she *does* have any hearing issues, you will be A-O.K. You have such a great perspective on life and ability to laugh and enjoy the little moments, I’m sure you would handle it like the awesome mom you are.

    By the way- it’s beautiful here in the ‘other’ Pac. NW city 🙂

  23. Jennifer says:

    My ds had hearing loss due to repeated ear infections. he has had 3 sets of tubes. he still gets ear infections, but not all the time like it was for 3 years. He has recovered his hearing and shows no signs of hearing loss at all. Typically hearing loss due to ear infections can be recovered by keeping the fluid out of the ears and trying to prevent infections, meaning tubes. I hope it works out for your dd.

  24. Yuka says:

    I’m truly sorry to hear about Laylee’s hearing loss. Even though I only hung out with her for one day when I came up there to see you, she’s one of my favorite kids. I’ll always remember her letting me draw her portrait in the living room. Thanks for being so wonderful and sharing your life even though life can be lame sommetimes. I’m sending some ca rays to you, if only mental ones.

  25. It was sunny this afternoon!!! Yippee!! The seattleites rejoice!

  26. Phew – I’m glad we got some sun today… that whole “burning blog thing” had me worried… however, it would have been fun to watch you dance around flames.


  27. Sketchy says:

    Hey just so you know, I have a hearing loss due to ear trauma when I was a child and I mean more than just ear infections, and I’m fine. I’m not deaf nor am I likely to become so. Not that this is any guarantee about Laylee, but I thought you’d like to know.

  28. Okay…I’m so curious what Melanie meant about “doing the two finger, peace sign, eyeball thingy”.

  29. I love you, man. I’m sorry for the crappy day!

  30. Christine says:

    The sun is overrated. We’ve already had three triple diget days here in northern CA. Good luck with your little one!

  31. Christine says:

    The sun is overrated. We are way too hot already in northern CA. Over 100 degrees- it is horrible. Good luck with your little one!

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