Watch What You Say

I never knew how often I said most of the annoying things I say until my oldest child started talking. Wow! I say some crazy-weird stuff. Hearing it repeated back to me, especially in the skewed way that she remembers it, is frightening at times.

One time I asked her to move as I was shutting the car door so I wouldn’t bonk her on the head. A couple of days later, we were in a store and out of nowhere she said, “Mommy, please don’t bonk me on the head, okay?” Um….yeah….I’ll try really hard to restrain myself. Let’s get out of here quick, before someone calls CPS.

Here are some responses she’s given recently because Magoo was annoying her:
-“Magoo! CHILL!”
-“What – THE – heck?!”
(These responses are only brought on when he does something hideously obnoxious like breathe or look in her direction.)

Yesterday she was obsessed with the idea of spurting grey-matter.
Laylee: You know the book with the yellow fish, the red fish, the white fish and the blue fish?
Me: Uh-huh.
Laylee: The white fish sneezes his brains out through his nose.
Me: I don’t remember that part.
Laylee: Yeah, but Daddy doesn’t sneeze his nose brains out because he puts water up there.

A little later as we’re playing a matching game on the carpet, Laylee keeps matching items that don’t go together and then laughing herself silly.

Laylee: You know what Mommy? Sometimes I laugh my BRAINS OUT!

Then I start questioning myself. Do I use the expression “my brains out” all the time?

I was crying my brains out. Stop yelling your brains out. I’m sneezing my brains out. That was so funny, I laughed my brains out. I’m not sure.

I think sometimes I can say something once and she just picks it up and latches onto it as her favorite phrase. But still…It makes me want to watch every word that comes out of my mouth.

Who wants their three year old to be the one in the church nursery saying, “That’s flippin’ hilarious” or “I’m gonna kick his trash”?

On the topic of watching what I say, I am quoted this month in Babytalk Magazine, talking about how I let Magoo act as a human vacuum cleaner, eating food off our floor. This quote reaffirms to me that I made the right decision in using made-up names for my kids on the blog.

And for all you new and potential bloggers out there, if you choose to go the nickname route with your kids, choose nicknames you wouldn’t mind being used by all of your family and friends who read the blog, including yourself. We chose these names for the blog because they were nicknames we had used every once in a while in the past. At this point, we call them Laylee and Magoo quite often and I’ve had family members tell me they have trouble remembering their real names.

The Babytalk article is great. I wish I’d read it when I was starting my blog last year. (And there’s more than a little giddiness around here about being mentioned. Some people try to play it cool, but I can see right through them, especially since they were the ones to initiate the hand-holding.) Sadly, the article’s author, Meagan Francis’s blog went AWOL right before the April issue went to press. Her blog can now be found at

For some weekend fun, please check out the Carnival of Kid Comedy over at Life in a Shoe. Kim does a great job compiling funny stories for weekend reading enjoyment.

And finally, speaking of reading, if you haven’t given me your favorite book choice for the great reads list I’m compiling, please head over and do it. We’re just 7 away from 100.

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23 Responses to Watch What You Say

  1. Pam in Utah says:

    Yep, what you say and how you say it are big in a child’s mind! Your little Laylee has SUCH a cute sense of humor–wonder WHERE she got that from? 🙂 Love ya

  2. Naddin J says:

    What ARE their real names? I’m new to your blog and the first time I read about Magoo I thought, “As in MR. MAGOO? What kind of cruel parents are these?” 🙂

    I didn’t know how much slang I used until one time when I was subbing in Primary, teaching a really young class… I wanted them to sit down and told them to “park it” – they all looked at me blankly. Huh? My best friend, a Mexicana by birth, has been in the U.S. for years and speaks excellent English, but still has to ask me what I mean when I say things like “It’s sixes” and “I was totally wigged out.”

  3. Gabriela says:

    Maybe you should change “posting my guts out” to “posting my brains out”. I know what you mean about having little tape recorder running around the house. Sometimes my 8 year old says stuff I and I am thinking, “Oh my gosh! Do I REALLY sound like that?” Oh well, keeps me in check. Congrats on the Babytalk article!

  4. owlhaven says:

    It’s scary how much kids imitate us, huh? When my 7 yr old gets hurt, my 3 yr old will run over and say, You’ll be all right, in exactly the tone I use. But somehow it waaay ticks him off coming from his little sister– making it all the more fun for her to say, of course!

    Mary, mom to many

  5. HLH says:

    Did you not know that you are also mentioned here:

    Hope I rememberd how to tag right?

    Anyway, yes kids are very absorbent about what we say. I LURVE the way my almost 4 year old says good morning to his sister. Aparently I use a higher pitched voice when I say good morning to her, because now the boy says “Goooood Moooorning Little Girl” in his best falseto sing songy voice!

  6. HLH says:

    My HTML skills are wanning, anyway here is the link I tried to post.

  7. Lei says:

    I’ve become aware of how often I use the word annoying… my dd repeated it the other day, just missing it by a couple letters. I had to rofl, though: “Mommy, J is ignoring me.” “Um, sweety, he’s hanging on you right now, he’s not ignoring you.” “No, mom, he IS ignoring.”


    Wanna tell me how to install RSS, btw? Been missing your visits. 🙂

  8. Erika says:

    Totally cool. I found you through the big yellow house. Glad to have found you.

  9. Caryn says:

    I LOVE the conversations you post. They always have me cracking up. Makes me excited about having my own kid(s) someday. (Not that I was dreading it before. Well. You know.)

  10. RGLHM says:

    I’m so flippin happy for you!!! YAHOO you’ve made it to the magazines already. Keep it up!

  11. Beth says:

    Hi. I found your blog through the BabyTalk article. I really enjoyed reading it. I’m in the Puget Sound too. Only across the water from you, in Bremerton. I, too, have been struggling with my daughter (four years old) repeating everything I say. She even tells her little brother (two years old) “Don’t come cryin’ to me!” It’s hilarious, but I know I have to watch myself. It’s so hard!!!

  12. Amber says:

    1. I heart your tulip background- seriously my favorite ever.

    2. I cringe when I hear kid #2 tell off kid #3 in the same voice I use to tell her off. (blush)

    3. Congrats on the mention in the article! That’s awesome and you totally deserve it!

  13. Kendra says:

    Seen your blog site in BabyTalk Magazine and thought I check it out. I enjoyed reading your blog on and will try to come back often to read more.

  14. Leah says:

    Okay. I found your blog in BabyTalk too. It’s great, I really love that you nicknamed your children (I didn’t).
    My 7 and 5 year olds have picked up a word from their best friend. ACTUALLY. As in, “Actually, Mom, I’m not hungry.” or, “Actually, you do it like this.” It could go on and on. So annoying, but they just keep doing it. 🙂

  15. Farm Wife says:

    Found you courtesy of Babytalk. Must go and thank them!
    I had to pick nicknames for my kids or Husband would’ve had a coranary. He’s already freaked out that “any psycho can read what you write.”

    #1 Son (who is almost 3) now adds “of course” to the end of every sentence. And Baby Girl (soon to be 5) stomped through the kitchen shouting, “Give me a BREAK!!” this week. YIKES! Just glad they seem to miss the (very) occasional obscenity that slips out.

  16. surcie says:

    I think your head needs a tiara. Or an Easter bonnet.

  17. I knew Little Brother was spending too much time with teenage boys while “we” volunteer in the school lunchroom when I offered him a snack and he said, “I don’t like that. It sucks.”

  18. bon says:

    It was when both of the older Chaos Girls would use “ummmm, Tsk…” as a conversational place holder that I finally realised I DO THAT!

    “Birdie, where are your shoes?”
    “ummm, tsk… in the van I think.”

    “LaLa, what was your favorite part of today?”
    “ummmmmm, tsk… pony dash!” (her answer every nite for the past three weeks)

    Why do I do that? Ummm, tsk, I dunno.

  19. Bobita says:

    I have to admit…I might be a sailor…which is not good! Out of the mouths of babes….

    DYM, Congrats on the Babytalk article!! That is soooo WOO-HOO!! I would love to chat with you sometime about some research I am brewing up…involving moms who blog! (Unless 5 to 1 Gottman beats me to the punch!!) Hee-hee!

  20. Emily says:

    love the tulips!! so pretty and spring-y!

  21. Lee says:

    This post has been removed by the author.

  22. krista says:

    how about this one-

    when my friend and her new boyfriend shacked up and bought a brand spanking new car I said to Chris- “how on earth do you think they are affording that, Jack certainly doesn’t have any money” (judgemental person that I was- don’t worry I;ve since evolved 😉 I’m only human)

    THe next time I talked to this friend on the phone and she asked to speak to my son (who was 4 at the time) he asked her “how did you buy that car, mommy said Jack doesn’t have any money?”

    I could have just about died. Taught me a lesson.

  23. Elena says:

    i have just been laughing my brains out at this post.. thank you!!

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