Daring Young Mom

When I see a sign like this, I don’t think of great furniture deals. Instead, I reach frantically for the wipes and pray that I’ve got a spare change of clothes in the car.

STOREWIDE? Are you kidding me? How many wipes do you think that would take?

Much has been said about the Idaho Bloggirls get-together last weekend. The other attendees’ narrations of the evening are a lot of fun but a bit exaggerated to make it sound like THE BEST NIGHT EVER!!!!

I’m worried people are getting jealous so I think it’s time I share my version of the events. Basically all we did was sit around, eat potatoes and surf the web. A few people talked via instant messenger across the table on their laptops.

The truth is, we’re all so socially inept, it’s become increasingly hard to speak with our voices or look at someone without a computer screen as a shield. Thank goodness Karen was able to find a restaurant with wireless internet AND killer french fries. Sadly, most of the girls forgot their webcams so I didn’t actually get to see them speak or move.

Man, those mashed potatoes were creamy.

I was able to pass my camera around the table and have everyone take pictures of themselves, which I then photoshopped together to make it look like we actually interacted.

Karli, Stephanie and “Elizabeth”, the girl Stephanie brought to trick us into thinking she has friends in real life

Mary, April, Beth

Heather and Taffi

Emily, Alicia, Moi (yes, I do have a body to go with the floating head), and Brooke

It’s been said by many people that we were all afraid someone would turn out to be an old hairy man. No one was old, I was the only one that sounded like a man (it was a cold, I swear) and none but Alicia was plagued with facial hair.

Karen and Heather are both lovely girls, AND no one ever said they don’t have freakishly long tongues. They made us proud.

Erin, my longtime “real” friend and new blogging friend looks exactly like Natalie Portman. Feel free to check out her site and encourage her.

Honestly, to quote Mr. Bingley, “Upon my honour I never met with so many pleasant girls in my life, as I [did that] evening; and there [were] several of them, you see, uncommonly pretty.” We had a blast and I hope to meet many more of you, my internet girlfriends.

A girl in every “port”, ya know?

Also – Did anyone else see David Hasselhoff crying at the end of American Idol? Yeah… me too.

Um… buying a house while selling a house is WAY more complicated than just buying a house.

That is all.

P.S. Thanks for all the great tips. If I live through this week, I may get the chance to use them.

The three wonderful ladies at MommyBloggers have gotten together to send a fellow breeding cyber pontificator to BlogHer this summer.

I’m shocked and more than way excited to be the one they chose to send. I’m guessing in the end they picked the applicant who could benefit most from meeting all the amazing women there and basking in their wise bloggishness. I am seriously so grateful and so nervous. Chris has graciously offered to take me in off the street so we can be hotel roomies. Now all I have left to take care of is airfare…

Any takers? If you have airmiles or Benjamins you’d like to donate to send me from Seattle to San Jose, you can expect to receive your very own Daring-Young-Hand-Crafted Disney princess dress or other costume of your choice in time for Halloween this year. Here are some samples of my work:

What? You don’t usually spend $250 on Halloween costumes for your kids? I weep for them.

I also weep for Alicia who will be paying dearly for the unflattering pictures she posted of me on her blog today. I have PhotoShop and I’m not afraid to use it. As I repeatedly tell Laylee, there will be consequences… and they will happen on approximately Wednesday. Tomorrow I’m gonna be asking for moving tips.

Magoo took his first unassisted steps while I was out of town and Laylee greeted me this morning by telling me that she had goobies in her eyes last night. It’s okay because she took them out of her eyes and fed them to the monsters. Hmm…okay. Welcome home to me. The trip was great (details to follow) but I sure missed these crazy kids… and Dan, don’t get me started. That man is sweetness personified.

Karli and I are off on our crazy adventure to meet the ladies.

She wore a cheese hat following our cheese tour in Washington.

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We were checked out by teenaged boys in low-rise jeans and “wife-beaters”* who apparently thought knew we were hot.

A woman in Albertsons called Karli and I “girls,” setting us up for a weekend of giddy glee.

We ate lunch in a dark restaurant when the power went out in Oregon.

Our gas was pumped by others.

We sang the entire Les Miserables soundrack at the top of our lungs.

We met up with the coolest girls around!

Dinner was raucous in a corner booth in DOWN TOWN BOISE. WOOT!

Wild dancing has occurred.

Our hotel rooms are in the middle of a massive group of prom celebrators.

The talking, the gabbing, the hugging, the interrupting, the LOVE! More to come.

The big group gets together tomorrow. Yippee.

P.S. WE GOT THE HOUSE. Cross your fingers that the inspector finds anything wrong if it is wrong. And cross your fingers that there’s nothing wrong.

*Beth says they’re called “K-Feds” now.